Two facts are important when considering this picture. Firstly, it’s a Japanese scotch egg. You can imagine how excited I was when I clapped eyes on it. I’d like to think by some weird twist of fate that the Japanese have been eating scotch eggs for millennia, and it was a recent import to the UK. This would chime with the legend of Marco Polo’s noodle import-exploits. Unfortunately neither story is likely to be true, but I will start repeating it to see if it can be established as fact (can someone update Wikipedia?). Secondly, this scotch egg is one of the fastest in the world, having travelled at 300km/h on the legendary Shinkansen. It’s going to be in the system for another couple of hours.